Brain Drippings

David Bromwich says it at least as well as I could, and hey, he’s already written it.

Guy walks into a bar with three ducks;  sits them on the bar and goes to the loo. The largest duck walks over to the bartender and says “Allow me to introduce myself;  I’m Huey.  I’m a duck.”
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  A furious light saber duel is under way. DARTH VADERis backing LUKE SKYWALKER toward the end of the gantry. A quick move by Vader chops off Luke’s hand! It goes spinning off into the ventilation shaft. Luke backs away. He looks round, but realizes there’s nowhere to go but straight down.

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Here we have, finally, a look at the inner workings of our favorite household pets, acquired at great risk and after much tribulation.

Cats and Dogs Secret Diaries